this is how i begin....

"somedays i wana quit..
somedays i feel like shit..
just feel normal for a bit.."

ive been listening to this song everyday...
while driving, during breaks from work, i humm it...
but each time i hear it i understand it in a completely different context from the previous one..

someone once told me..
i cant seek my share of happiness in others..
a common mistake all of us make..
as long as i 'depend' on someone to come and change that very moment thats f***ing you up, by adding a little dash of themselves to it...

"So, I want you to know it's a little fucked up,
That I'm stuck here waitin', at times debatin',"


ive ended..enough..
recetly ive had an urge "to begin"..

honestly, for a week now, if not more iv seen myself evolve / change (however you want to put it)


i dont want to drink
turned myself into a vegetarian
i've had enough of explaining, and talking and justifying..
especially with the number of walls that im surrounded with..
now i like the silence around me..
i chose to not justify anymore..

ive never understood what Vivekananda said, what Aurobindo preached, i just remember conversations, not people involved in them...just the conversation..


"I'm doin' fine, I plan to keep it that way,
You can call me if you find that you have something to say,"


i chose not to be trapeed between the good, bad and the ugly..

i choose to be(with) myself..