It is the pleasure of searching and the pleasure of the adventure. You are nourishing something that’s very important-your dreams. We must never stop dreaming. Dreams provide nourishment for the soul, just as a meal does for the body. Many times in our lives we see our dreams shattered and our desires frustrated, but we have to continue dreaming. If we don’t, our soul dies… …The Good fight is the one we fight because our heart asks it of us… …The Good fight is the one that’s fought in the name of our dreams. When we’re young our dreams first explode inside us with all of their force, we are very courageous, but we haven’t yet learned how to fight. With great effort, we learn how to fight, but by then we no longer have the courage to go into combat. So we turn against ourselves and do battle within. We become our own worst enemy. We say that our dreams were childish, or too difficult to realize, or the result or our not having known enough about life. We kill our dreams because we are afraid to fight the good fight. The first symptom of the process of killing our dreams is lack of time… The Busiest people I have known in my life always have time enough to do everything. Those who do nothing are always tired and pay no attention to the little amount of work they are required to do. They complain constantly that the day is too short. The Truth is, they are afraid to fight the good fight… The second symptom of the death of our dreams lies in our certainties. Because we don’t want to see life as a grand adventure, we begin to think of ourselves as wise and fair and correct in asking so little of life. We look beyond the walls of our day-to-day existence, and we hear the sound of lances breaking, we smell the dust and the sweat, and we see the great defeats and the fire in the eyes of the warriors. But we never see the delight, the immense delight in the hearts of those engaged in the battle. For them, neither victory nor defeat is important; what’s important is only that they are fighting the good fight. And, finally, the third symptom of the passing of our dreams is peace. Life becomes a Sunday afternoon; we ask for nothing grand, and we cease to demand anything more than we are willing to give. In that state we think of ourselves as being mature; we put aside the fantasies of our youth, and we seek personal and professional achievement. We are surprised when people our age say that they still want this or that out of life. But really, deep in our hearts, we know that what has happened is that we have renounced the battle for our dreams-we have refused to fight the good fight. When we renounce our dreams and find peace, we go through a period of tranquility. But the dead dreams begin to rot within us and to infect our entire being. We become cruel to those around us, and then we begin to direct this cruelty against ourselves…What we sought to avoid in combat-disappointment and defeat-came upon us because of our cowardice. And one day, the dead, spoiled dreams make it difficult to breath, and we actually seek death. It’s death that frees us from out certainties, from our work, and from that terrible peace of Sunday afternoons.”
The Pilgrimage by Paulo Coelho P. 58

Be The Change You Want To See In This World - Mahatma Gandhi

During 1930’s, a young boy had become obsessed with eating sugar. His mother was very upset with this. But no matter how much she scolded him and tried to break his habit, he continued to satisfy his sweet tooth. Totally frustrated, she decided to take her son to see his idol - Mahatma Gandhi; perhaps her son would listen to him.
She walked miles, for hours under scorching sun to finally reach Gandhi’s ashram. There, she shared with Gandhi her predicament. -“Bapu, my son eats too much sugar. It is not good for his health. Would you please advise him to stop eating it?”
Gandhi listened to the woman carefully, thought for a while and replied,“Please come back after two weeks. I will talk to your son.”
The woman looked perplexed and wondered why had he not asked the boy to stop eating sugar right away. She took the boy by the hand and went home.
Two weeks later they revisited Gandhi. Gandhi looked directly at the boy and said,“Boy, you should stop eating sugar. It is not good for your health.”
The boy nodded and promised he would not continue this habit any longer. The boy’s mother was puzzled. She turned to Gandhi and asked,“Bapu, Why didn’t you tell him that two weeks ago when I brought him here to see you?”
Gandhi smiled,“Mother, two weeks ago I was eating a lot of sugar myself.”

THE CAT THAT ELOPED WITH THE SAINT

with almost 5000 hairstrands given up hope on me in the past one month....multiple visits to doctors and nearly half my salary blown up on medicines..i managed to swing on an old forest jeep in the middle of a dark corbett road..tracing the names of constellations that paid a visit on a foggy night...with green apple aftertaste and a piece of "chilly chicken" that followed me to the city of the unhealthy and the beautiful..i questioned the very possibilities of sainthood and me finally getting to see how magnetic a magnetic storm really is!

Gu's down to 46 kgs.....galt baat hai

"lumière du côté en noir de moi"

- light on the dark side of me

i want you to return like the unseasonal rain....

a threat to the weather experts..

a delight for me..

205920 seconds = estimated number of times i have inhaled/exhaled since..

in the midst of unprecedented rain, the african spider dances round and round....rejoicing twisting his thin manipulative legs... trying to confuse the vulnerable prey...

what the spider does not realize is how vulnerability changes sides... caught in it's own web, the spider turns prey to its own feed...

"...love man not less...but nature more"

two days since the 'character sketch' has been up
3 eligible dogs on heat have already shown their keen interest.

its so cool to click "REJECT" for someone...i ve started to enjoy this game

where's my dark knight?

ive been asked by just too many people to try out one of the matrimonial sites for my future prospects..which seems pretty dull if i keep shunning men around me...i dont know why none of them (family that is) dosent recommend me any dating site..maybe the idea of a f*** after marriage sounds better than f*** before the official commitment.

However strange this may seem..i have actually decided to go ahead with the option...and post my "character sketch" on shaadi.com..

The idea seems quite intriguing...i wish to see this scenario i.e. the matrimonial portal as a huge buffet...too many dishes...id wana try some, ignore some..and hog on the one that i find best... (not such a good example)..

so here is the "get to know me" text - a clear reflection of who i am (have become):
i am 25 in 2 months (in case i dont kill myself drinking too many breezers), love alcohol, love work, often get screwed (at work that is), otherwise its been a while, pleasantly suicidal, intensely murderous, 4 years experience in the developmental sector, 5 in the mental sector, expert training in handling abusive, immature, hyper, confused men..training in weeping using all possible vocal chords by three expert national level trainers, along with a crash course in fighting using both traditional indian and british abuses..

...im still working on it...


yours (blushing..:))

it's a miracle..that took 7 months and a lot of office politics to take shape..

i took a leave from work yesterday..because..i was tired...

instead..i bought silver...satisfied my taste buds with thai jumbo prawns..and came face to face with my friend's ghostly mother..


slept for 11 hours yesterday..and 10 today..

couldn't get any better..

(p.s. but then i have a quarterly report staring through my laptop that i need to complete...damn!...reality strike 1)

he looked into her eyes trying to sell her the most romantic line from mills and boons..

she burst out laughing in disgust..

ouuch!

the line that sank somewhere in a calender

210 red strikes on a calender

120 additional pencil marks this year

the year that left and the one thats half way through

its 11th july

i dont love me no less..
i only started to love myself more

I THINK ABOUT YOU EVERYDAY

THEY SAY - "GET A LIFE"

I SAY : "NO!"

maybe this sounds better

i am the "Tryptophan" of my life

"we used to be in love at one point of time..
now we're like a married couple - fighting, struggling, bored"


hearing stuff like this makes me question the very foundation of commitment and love..if at all they were borne from the same nerve.

i plan to go to a dating / matrimonial institute in some days...all prepared to fail in finding the most simple qualities i seek in a man besides no cheating, no illegitimate kids and is happy to cook breakfast (occasionally happy to add the other two meals as well...yeh zyada ho gaya shayad)


learn to do things first before asking/expecting for the same and acknowledge every little thing one does to keep things nice n happy..these are words of an experienced failure...

in reality...madam celestial..the only person you need to be completely gaga- gugu over is yourself....by expecting someone else to treat you that way means your accept yourself to be a commodity....simple

i think we can finalize the dates for our mountain retreat now...end of july / first week august??

i warned you for a long long time...

this is only the beginning..

what goes round..has just begun coming around


:-)




http://in.youtube.com/watch?v=beX7sZ-smvk

FINALLY!

i have the most amazing notebook ive bought from my sweat n blood....its beautiful..its high end...and it would have not been possible had Chacha Chaudhury not accompanied me..

yEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!